Forgiveness

Honestly, forgiveness is something that I have struggled with for years. I learned that forgiveness does not happen over night . We often say we forgive , but then we bring it up over and over again . Forgiveness is not about saying , “I accept your apology.” It is about genuinely letting go of the hurt and moving on . It is not for the other person , but it is for you .

For years, I found myself being angry with my father . My parents have been divorced since I was six months , and my mom had sole custody . No matter what their relationship looked like she always encouraged my brother and I to reach out to my father and try to have a healthy and normal relationship with him . Unfortunately for me it felt like every time I tried, I would just keep getting disappointed . Honestly, for years I resented my father . I hated when my mom would tell me I looked like him or had certain behaviors of his . I wanted no parts of him . I was angry that I could not be daddy’s little princess or could never attend a father-daughter dance. My relationship with him hindered me from trusting men . It caused me to search for love in some of the wrong places. It kept me from completely loving and accepting love .

Just recently I realized that I had to move on . I could not continue to dwell on past hurt . Every man is not the same as my father . Some men do actually keep promises. Some men are truly consistent , not perfect but consistent. While I was ruining relationships and hating my father , he was living his best life . He was perfectly content with his behavior and was not losing any sleep. I had to forgive him in order to be my best self . God would deal with him for his actions . In Romans 12:19 God reminds us of this by telling us that vengeance is His . He will take care of all of our troubles .

Forgiveness can be extremely hard to do, but it is necessary. Words hurt. Actions hurt. Lies hurt. I get it, but you have to move on. While you have acquired hate in your heart and are all upset , the very ones that hurt you are out living their best lives. They may care enough to ask for forgiveness , but they may not . Either way life goes on . I’m not saying that you have to forget their actions . In fact, if a person keeps doing the same thing and needing forgiveness they probably are not truly sorry . Forgiveness is not condoning the action, but simply letting it go . Life is too short to hold on to grudges, but we must show compassion for others just as God has done for us .

3 Comments on “Forgiveness

  1. Yes, Jackie the Giant you are–in your giving to anyone in need, in your support concerning the dreams of others, in your love for life, and your ability to persevere amid the storms that life have presented you with. I am extremely proud of you–especially in your choosing to forgive those who have hurt you, this is a Giant step for you.

    Forgiveness is not an option according to Word of God (Matthew 6:14-15). Forgiveness means mercy–mercy that comes from God, and even still it’s hard to forgive. However, when we admit to God that we know that we must forgive, but we do not want to, it is in our being completely honest that God softens our hearts, and we begin to let go saying: “Father, not my will but Your will be done in this situation”–committing every relationship (the good, the bad, and the ugly) up to Him.

    You are on the right path!

    Continued Blessings,

    Mom

    Liked by 1 person

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